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(this love is) eternal

by SESPOOL

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    "(this love is) eternal" on limited edition slime green or overcast sky grey cassette with a unique hand colored label. only 20 available!

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  • Full Digital Discography

    Get all 16 SESPOOL releases available on Bandcamp and save 50%.

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Jingle Bells, the moon is all there's left to kill, keep the darkness deep, the reckoning, another way, Silent Night, before the fog covers me, lost waves crash, and 8 more. , and , .

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1.
how the fuck I'm 'sposed to stack up if I ain't never got no back up and how the fuck I'm 'sposed to glow up if u ain't never fuckin showed up? five fuckin years now this motherfuckin bullshit caught up in her eyes til I'm screamin from a pulpit rip off my own face so I can't see anymore hard to look up at the sky with my heart on the floor yeah, blood blood blood blood blood everywhere tangled in my thoughts scratch n claw my fingers bare and I'd still give my life for her if she was here cause this love is eternal and it's my biggest fear to never know...again...what it means...to care. and I gave it my all but I'm not what you want I gave it my all but I'm not what you want even tho you fuckin slit my throat and watched me bleed the fuck out into this love we wrote you don't gotta bring the roses or a fuckin casket self sufficient as shit - how you think we lasted? ghosts ghosts ghosts in my reflection internally torn externally scorned fuckin choke and slap me out like the bitches in porn pull my hair curse my heart how this love is born and still, to this motherfuckin day, I wouldn't have that shit any other way I pop a pill to cop a feel of what was yesterday because your love was a drug and it fuels me and I gave it my all but I'm not what you want I gave it my all but I'm not what you want
2.
where do you go when all that you know is something that died so long ago? bleeding love in arms open sean e come back to life even if it's in the afterlife you can't live like this and hang yourself on the loss of your future wife you thought you had your shit all laid out now your heart done got played out but it's time to cash in turn to lil fuckin cinn slash a bitch cause change comes from within friday night it's the opiates and saturday the benzos not the steadiest diet but they make pretty good friends tho fuck it up fuck it up fuck it up yeah swallow it feel that hug inside it's the only love you can rely on bless the pharma plug ugh one day you'll get that touch but right now it's all in the rush the only way to get high is lookin into her eyes seein life that you thought was fucked that you thought was fucked that you know is fucked that you feel is fucked not givin up where do you go when all that you know is someone that died so long ago? friday night it's the opiates and saturday the benzos not the steadiest diet but they make pretty good friends tho pretty good friends they might make you rip off your fuckin skin but they won't stab you in the back and leave you broke as shit with panic attacks thinkin bout love lost and days you won't get back
3.
overcome 02:16
fuck food imma buy drugs and after that shit imma fall in love with myself just to see what it does to my health and if i overcome how can I grow if I can't show you how to move past the dark in my own mind stayin steady walkin sketch streets finessin for a new plug but maybe what I really need from you is a new drug the oxy runnin through my blood has been tapped out and all these colors in my life fade to black now a need to feed the inner fiend, embrace the pain and what it really means fuck food imma drugs and after that shit imma fall in love with myself just to see what it does to my health and if I overcome I'm poppin pills and poppin seals to remember how it feels with a knife in my chest but I refuse to let it kill the heartbeat inside of me that's flourishing even tho I know my soul needs more nourishing drip drip drip drip shut off this leaky faucet so that a bitch don't slip and I don't know how much time I've got left to shovel the rest of this dirt so I can forget (you) fuck food imma drugs and after that shit imma fall in love with myself just to see what it does to my health and if I overcome
4.
ccc 01:10
5.
the choice 02:47
when i close my eyes I see your face hovering above my bed in spades it's not the same feeling as before now that she's inside my head I'm really wanting more when you left the door so open wide the breeze swept in I froze and nearly died now that she's come through to warm it up I'm starting to feel like myself and getting less fucked up now that I can see what you really meant for me like a loaded gun put the pistol to my head and pull the trigger when you're done I was so in love with you but that was when we were still young and before- you made the choice to go away you made the choice on that day you made the choice ya voice is heard and in the end I get what I deserve when she opened up to me I knew this was something that I had to pursue alone in the dark I cannot stay now I know it was your ghost just keeping me awake and - you made the choice to go away you made the choice on that day you made the choice ya voice is heard and in the end I get what I deserve
6.
see u feel u 02:55
powder in my mouth hand on her blouse take it to the couch oh you feel it now so i focus on ya nose ring and all these things we been takin bite down like u own it there is no good morning we swim in confusion we live in this mourning we live in this mourning take it all off for me... we stay stuck in this goddamn mourning fiendin for fresh flesh in the morning on my skin I can feel you breathing it's so tense yet the seizing is pleasing cover that shit in liquid how fluid your hip is and inside you feel this drenched in sweat as we kiss I can see u next to me, get u fucked up right on sextascy I can see u next to me, get u fucked up right on sextascy I can feel u next to me, get u fucked up right on sextascy I can feel u next to me, get u fucked up right on sextascy Getcha fucked up right on sex, getcha fucked up right on ex powder pills medicine distress was it down with a burn n a flex pupils size of the moon candlelight like a ghost in the room I can feel ya love like a tomb don't worry you're cumin soon I can see u next to me, get u fucked up right on sextascy I can see u next to me, get u fucked up right on sextascy I can feel u next to me, get u fucked up right on sextascy I can feel u next to me, get u fucked up right on sextascy
7.
it's hard to know where the time goes when u stop livin for yourself and you dig and dig and dig... peel it back now can’t retract now actin like I like I really fuckin know how when it goes down crows in the dark still gotta feed in the light and when I’m feelin weak gotta believe in the fight back n forth n back n forth yeah I know I've been here I've been here before my whole body is sore my body is sore and now I gotta open the door to open the door to see is it is it true can I escape all of this for you? caught in a wave so this candle it gon burn out five little words I don't know how it's gon turn out depression n flexin n reminiscin while we stressin five litle words when you gonna learn your lesson? five little words when you gonna fuckin learn play with fire you get burned you gonna end up in an urn I still seem the same I learned to mask the pain and I know you’ve got my heart wrapped around your twisted mask I can’t look back if I can’t taste the poison in your thighs am I alive? caught in a wave so this candle it gon burn out five little words I don't know how it's gon turn out depression n flexin n reminiscin while we stressin five litle words when you gonna learn your lesson? five little words...I don't need you anymore.
8.
we're falling apart and I know the distance kills us both even tho you were the one who spoke and then broke everything we had for the sake of growth this love is eternal so it still grows I know, I know, I know, I know it grows.
9.
run baby run 03:15
this is the end this is the end on the edge of the water you drowned your best friend high on power and status blinded by wealth lost freezing cold countin' bands by yourself does it add up (nah) does it make sense (nah) droppin atomic bombs without a pretense lookin back at the bodies on the floor you're cryin out for help but you started the war locking hands and speaking softly without rings still meant love to me if you show weakness they're gonna cut ya throat kick the chair from your feet and leave you hangin from a rope and if you show weakness they're gonna tear you apart when you need em the most turn their back and depart but I'm forever a part... you can go far away from me but i am still so in you it's true ohhh you can go far away from me but i am still so in you it's true oohh you can run baby run baby run but you can't escape the bullet from the barrel of a gun when it's in your own hand lookin bloody n stunned cause you're fuckin around shootin shit for fun honey eyes in rainbow shadows I could still see yours in mine knick knack paddy whack give this dog a bone you ain't never comin home cause you chose to be alone when you shatter your own heart you're livin injury prone so I'm fuckin on ya bitch while you're lurkin on a phone you can't escape this shit when you shoot expect to be hit (to be hit) I never did you wrong I gave you all of me for so long so, so long you can go far away from me but i am still so in you it's true ohhh you can go far away from me but i am still so in you it's true oohh
10.
she helped me to sleep again and she helped me to trust a friend and she helped me to love again and she showed me to breathe again again, again, again, here we go again and again and again and again... she came into my life I need someone to ride something to hold onto so I dipped inside not just the touch of skin, a fresh fuckin mind to fight off the demons without pills n wine smashin through the city, yeah grippin her thigh lockin into this vibe I'm catchin fire from her eyes and I know we're fallin fast, sober as fuck feelin high but she gave me all her love when I thought I might die she helped me to sleep again and she helped me to trust a friend and she helped me to love again and she showed me to breathe again how to breathe again oh, here we go again...

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released July 12, 2019

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SESPOOL San Francisco, California

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